Marriage counseling can be a great way to help couples work through their issues, but it's not always the right solution. When the two partners have different schedules, or if either partner isn't completely honest, counseling won't be effective. According to relationship and marriage expert Dr. John Gottman, couples wait an average of six years of unhappiness before seeking help.
If one partner wants to have children and the other doesn't, that can be a decisive factor in whether the marriage can be viable in the long term. Sometimes problems in marriage can be too deep-seated and long-standing for counseling to be effective. Talia Litman, a certified marriage and family therapist, suggests being careful when life's schedules and deadlines don't align and will never align in a marriage. If you're no longer interested in marriage therapy or rekindling that spark, it could be another sign that you need a divorce lawyer.
The effectiveness of marriage counseling is directly related to the level of motivation of both partners and time. If you've been trying to work through your issues for a while without success, it may be time to consider other options. When you can't overcome a major breach of trust in marriage despite a lot of efforts and arguments, that's a telltale sign that your marriage may be irreparable. My advice is to stop wasting time reading blog posts and put your energy into marriage counseling.
MH International is proud to support Marriage Helper Inc., a 501 (c) charity (which donates to people in financial need during a marital crisis). Over the decades that we've been working with struggling marriages, three out of four of those couples overcame their situations and managed to get their marriages back to good.